Marriage (Part 2)

Back to the going out thing. Mark introduced me to the girl accross the street, Rosalee.told me that I should take her out and show her how to have fun. So after him bugging me a bunch of times I did. We had a good time. Went to the Red House in Leesburg. Then she found out about a male review, her friend Bea told her about. So Bea, Rosalee, and I went. We had a real good time. I was always the DD. Cause I didn't drink. After that we befriended these dancers. Bobby the owner, Joel, Eddie, and Cody Lee. Bobby would call me when they were going to be around. I gave him and Cody my work number. Sometimes they would call me just to talk, and see how I was doing. Finally I got My friend Joan to go to a show so she could meet Cody. She had heard me talk about him alot. I don't believe she thought I was telling her the truth when I would tell her how hot he was, until that night when she saw him for the first time. He came into the bar came right over to me and kissed me square on the lips. After that he went into the back to get ready, she slugs me in the arm and says I can't believe you haven't f....d him yet. It's obvious he likes you. I said yeah I know but I'm married. She said to hell with Mark he's an asshole. I said can't do that. The first time I noticed Cody was when Rosalee and I went to see them. She had to leave the show early because of her son. She told me to talk to Cody and see if he could go out with us sometime outside of a show. So after that show we talked. We sat in the parking lot at Taco Bell and talked for 2 hours. Next thing I know he's kissing me. Finally I told him I couldn't and we needed to stop. I was petrified to tell Rosalee what happened. It took me 2 weeks. Once I did she was like heck girl don't worry. God was I relieved. Then when she saw him with me she said girl he has got it bad. I wasn't so sure. I still believe that he just used me because I was married and always wore my wedding ring. He knew I would never cheat on Mark. So therefore he was safe. If the girls were really bad he would cling to me. After a while Mark didn't like me going out anymore forbid to go out to any male reviews. He almost got arrested once for trying to drag me out from one. Finally on September 26 1998 I left him. There are so many other stories I could tell. I could actually have a sitcom about my life. Some of the things us girls did was wild. My divorce from Mark was final Feb. 17, 1998.

Marriage

I would like to say that the next 13 years were fun but I'm not a good liar. Our son Joshua was born on June 24th, 1986, 25 years to the date after me. That's right he was born on my birthday, after 29 hours of labor. I made a joke during labor that it must have his fathers nose and it keeps getting hung up in there. We were still living with my parents. I came home the day I had him. My Dad, my Grandma, and my sister Joy were there when I got home. The next day I was sore from my neck to my ankles. The baby was crying, all Mark could say was, get the f.... up and get the baby. I said I can't I'm to sore. He gave me a shove instead of getting up for me. That was pretty much how the whole marriage went. We moved in with his sister and her husband. That was a mistake. I saw him shove a gun in her mouth. There were certain ways she wanted things. We finally moved to NY. My friend Debbie let us stay with them for 2 weeks. Then we moved into a 1 room effiency apartment. We lived in NY until Josh was 13 months. I didn't work that whole year. We moved back to FL. I stayed @ my parents with Josh. Mark stayed with his parents. I did it that way because then that way Mark would be motivated to get a house. Sure enough, in one month we had a mobile home. I started working again at T J Maxx. Started going out with my friends to clubs. Let Mark go out. I trusted him. Because I knew I wasn't cheating. Then he started accusing me of cheating. This went on for the rest of our marriage even when I quit going out. In January of 1990 I was expecting baby number 2. Mark's Mom died April 30th. Our daughter Jerusha was born Sept. 24th, 1990. After only one hour of labor. Then in 1992 I was in a bad accident. A lady T-boned me. I got a settlement. We bought our first real house. The kids were 8 and 4 we were going to church on a regular basis. I thought life was good. Then Mark started acting weird again. I was really involved in the church. In the choir and the daycare, Mark drove the church bus. At one point some man called my house threatening Mark's life for supposedly hitting on his wife. I gave the guy our address and told him to cone on over I had a bullet with his name on it, he never showed up. That was the beginning of the end for me. I started going to male reviews with Rosalee, someone Mark befriended..,more tomorrow.

The Wedding

It was a chilly Decemember day. After having to change my plans several times, we finally got married at the club house in the mobile home park where we were living with my parents. Wehad the reception there too. It was small I did wear a wedding dress with a hat with a veil. It was victorian. We were to have a car with a rumble seat. Didn't get that either. There were about 35 people their. The food was good prepared by my mom and his mom. My maid of honor was Janet a girl I barely knew because my best friend bailed on me because she didn't like Mark. My dad walked me down an isle between folding chairs. To the wedding march which my friend Denise played high as a kite because she she was nervous. She kept repeating the first two lines. I didn't wear my glasses. But I saw David's girlfriend wearing a white dress with a black hat. I was so upset. My friend Marg caught the bouquet, David caught the guarder. When he had to put it on Margie's leg his girlfriend got mad and left. Tried to disrupt everything but that didn't work. So she sat in the car and sulked. When we went over to his parents house that night she wanted an apology, she didn't get one from me or Mark. I was hormonal @ 3 months pregnant any way.

Mark

I'ed like to say Mark is interesting, smart, and charming but he's not. I met him as I said before when I was out with my friend Denise. Her and I and some guy friend of hers, I don't remember his mame, all went out to the ABC lounge in Apopka. We went in sat @ the rotating bar had a few drinks. As it ustally went in those days I would only buy one or no drinks. As soon as I walked in the door someone would ask me to dance I would say yes and that was that. Dance then a drink. Well this night no different. Only the second guy I danced w/was Mark. He said he saw me up on the dance floor w/this biker lookin' dude and wondered why I was w/him then when I came his way to sit down and said excuse me because I bumped him, he had to dance w/me. We danced, the man can dance. He looked rough, long jet black hair, dirty clothes, a Harley hat w/a naked woman w/wings and military boots on. I thought what the hey he can dance and as long as he buys the drinks. Then he tells me he has a show corvette outside I said yeah right. Well then Denise's friend gets kicked out so we leave. We're in the parking lot he smokes the tires, here comes this corvette. Oh @ this point he tells me everyone calls him Sparky. Denise starts freakin' out thinkin' the guy in the vette is gonna kill us till I tell her it's the guy I met inside. He asks me to ride w/him to ABC in Casselberry. Denise says go ahead her and her friend will follow us. I said ok but if tries anything funny I'm jumpinh out I don't care if he is doing 55 mph. Well we got there the bouncer knew him we got in free except for Denises friend they wouldn't let him in because he didn't have a collar on his shirt, so he left. We sat down Mark got up to go to thd bathroom. Another guy asked me to dance I said yes, after that he bought me a drink, which was more than mark was doing. We danced again. The guy asked me to deal some coke for him I had no idea what to do. Then I saw Mark and Denise getting up to leave so I told the guy I had to go. Got outside and Mark starts yelling @ me so I yelled back telling him he was a cheap bastard, invites me out and doesn't buy me a drink. Then on our way homd now mind you there are three of us in this vette and Denise is not small. She starts a fight w/this guy going down thd highway. Mark says your friends pretty radical am I gonna have to get out my gun. Sure enough he had a Colt 45. Finally I got home he told me he would pick me up for work in the morning, and he did I told my mom he was coming to pick me up. When she found out he had a vette she thought I hit the big time. One time while Mark was over Dale called and asked me out I said I hadn't heard from him in 3 wks. Then I told him I was seeing someone steady. Mark got mad then too. My mother told him ge had no right to be mad I wasn't wearing a ring. Well he fixed that that weekend. He asked me too marry him I said yes, this was three mths after we met. There were many times he made me cry. I still say he was nuts. We decided to get married Dec. 21 1985. Then toward the end of Sept. my mom told me Fred called. I wrestled w/hdthat for a couple weeks. I decided to break the engagement. By this time we were living w/my parents. At their suggestion to save money. I told Mark I didn't want to marry him. He cried like a baby. I caved. We got married on the set date. I was 3 mths pregnant then. Didn't get the wedding I wanted. Mark could never seem to hold a job.

Aaahh Florida

I moved to Florida the summer of 84. I wanted Mitch to move w/me, but he said he would wait till Sept. When Sept. rolled around no Mitch. Finally I called him he admitted he never wanted to come to Florida. I got so mad. I yelled @ him and told him I gave him every opportunity to tell me he didn't want to be with me. He said he did want to be w/me just not In Florida, but he knew I really wanted to go so he didn't want to stand in my way. Very selfless man. I was angry because I had been the good girlfriend and not been going out. Well that all changed. I got a job at a new store opening up T J Maxx I liked it alot. Became dept. Lead after 1 month. Made tons of new friends. Met tons of guys who would come into the store just to see me. At the point that I met my husband I was dating 5 guys @ one time. One guy named Steve looked just like David Hasselhoff. There was him, Dale, Greg, Tom, and Fred who I met while out w/Steve. Steve left to go to the bathroom, this guy asked me to dance I said yes. We got done dancing he asked me to come set w/him I told him no I was there w/someone. Steve was coming I introd. them Fred got a little nervous 'cause Steve was a big guy. While setting on Steve's lap I gave Fred my phone number. After me putting Fred off for a while we went on our first date. He took me out on his boat for the day then to dinner. Then home the next day. Yes, I spent the night. Yes, it was great. A couple weeks later we spent the weekend together @ a friends house. The freind told me Fred really liked me or he wouldn't have brought me. I told him good 'cause I really liked Fred too. We went back to his place the ex-wife was there. He said what is she doing here. I never saw Fred again after that weekend talked to him a couple times that was it. I was devestated. Went out w/my friend Denise one of many times (boy there tons of stories of her and I.) I meet this guy named Mark. Mark deserves his own blog so more tomorrow.

My First Job

I had been looking for a job for quite a while. I didn't realize it would be so hard. People look at you different when you're handicapped. You have to prove your worth with everything you do. Finally I got a job @ the JM Murray Center as a payroll inventory controll clerk. It was a sheltered workshop for handicapped adults. But they knew right away that I didn't belong back in the workshop it's self. Even though I did the eval for it. I loved the job. Got to work with the clients too. But it was there that I met the first man I would be intimate with. His name was Ed. He looked like Beau Brady from Days of Our Lives. We dated for a while then he decided to get serious w/another girl so we broke it off. We still worked together but that was it. I moved into my first apartment while dating Ed w/my sister Cheryl. In a basement of a house in Cortland NY. It was cute cozy 190.00 a month. I decided if I was going to start having sex I had better take the pill I did not want any babies. My mom found out and was livid. I told her would she rather I do like Renee did or be smarter, then I said it was none of her business I had my own place and could do as I pleased. I met another guy named Mike while I was seeing a guy named Scott. Broke up w/Scott. Had to move back home. One night I decided to spend the night w/Mike. Went home the next day, my dad told me that if I was going to do stuff like that I could move out. So, I did. Me and a girl named Carry got a big 2 bdrm apt. Together. We worked together too. It was great. After about 8mths.Mike decides to brake up w/me. I was devestated. I tried everything to get him back. Well after a few months of moping. I decided to try the bar scene. Mean while I got rid of the glasses and got contacts and colored my hair a lighter blonde. After Mike I didn't date anyone serious for a couple years. Dated a couple local celebs. Dick D. and Martin F. but my main guy was Dave a lead singer in a local band. All the girls wanted Dave but to bad we had a good thing for a while. Had my own little goon squad. If Dave was out of town doin' a gig and me and my friend Joanne went out they were right there w/me. After a while I got sick of it though. I came into The Wiffle Tree my usual place, see Stoner (one of the squad) he kisses me on the cheek I notice this guy stairing @ me. We go sit down. The guy goes and talks to Stoner. After he's done I go over to Stoner and ask him who's the guy and what did he say. Stoner says that's Dave Finestein from The Rods he asked me who you were and if you were available. I told him your name and told him you were my best friends talent. Boy I went off. Broke it off w/Dave after that. Started doing a bowling league for the adults @ the w/shop on Saturdays. A guy named Mitch started working @ the shelter in the summer of 83. We started dating, he moved in w/me. My parents sell everthing and move to FL. in the spring of 84. Mitch and I lived together 8 mths. Till I decided to move to FL in the summer of 84. He did not want to move. So I quite my job and moved to FL. Leaving Mitch and the whole Cortland scene. On a side note remember Ed well he married the girl he left me for. After being married a couple years he came back to see me @ the Murray Center I had a new boss who new nothing about us. I asked Ed how married life was? He said" I work alot of hours." Repeatedly. After he left my boss says, what just happened here? I said I don't know what you mean. He said the electricity between you two. He said that guy is in love w/you. I said, oh well maybe he married the wrong girl. He said I'll say he did.

Summer After Graduation

I finally graduated. I had a grad/birthday party. Lots of friends and family came, we had it @ the park. Got lots of money. Which I used for my trip to AL. to spend the summer w/my grandma Martin. Cheryl went too. But, first I wemt to NYC W/Renee she had to go to the Phillipean Embassy to get ppwk in order so she could fly there to be w/her husband Sterling. He was an MP in the Air Force. Boy that was a trip, we shopped on 5th Ave. Some guy was standing in a show case window I looked in and he made goo goo eyes @ me. Don't you know Renee wants to go in that store. The guy followed me all over the store. On our way back home we stopped @ a resturant and they gave us the red carpet treatment. I assumed it was because I was talking about my trip to Jamaica, Renee her trip to the Phillipeans, her friend who had gone somewhere eles. So they thought we were rich. The next day Cheryl and I left for AL. we landed in Montgomery. Went down to Opp. We only stayed a month and a half. But in that month and a half we met lots of new ppl. They had a community pool that we took our little sister Heather to almost every day. I met the lifeguard there, Mike Anderson. We started dating instantly. Down there it's like instant celebrity the minute you tell ppl you're from NY. I met Mike's ex-girlfriend Kim. She sure wanted to keep me close. When she found out that Mike kissed me right away I thought she was gonna die. She said it took him three weeks to kiss her. I said I think it was just because I was a girl from NY. Mike and I went to church together @ his church. He came by on one of his days off and told me Kim walked in on him in his bedroom. His mother and Kim were planning a going away party for him. He was joining the Air Force that fall. One of our dates he took me by the football stadium, it was more like a colusium. He told me about how it would echo when the crowd would cheer. He was quite the star of his team. I would call him my Mike my grandma would say he's not your Mike. So a few years later when my mom and I went back to visit. We saw his mom, and she told my mom she always liked meeting her sons girlfriends since she had all boys. And that I was one of her favorites it did my heart good. Anyways we had Mike's party he left. We went to six flags over GA. Then the day before we were getting ready to leave we were walking back from the pool a car load of guys pulls along side us and asked us our names. Cheryl didn't want to stop but I did. I said our names don't matter 'cause we're leaving tomorrow. They asked where we were from I told them, they asked if we were Clayne Bedsole's cousin's I said, yes, they told me they had been looking for us all summer. I said not hard enough it's not that big a town. We flew back to NY. I got back just in time for my friemd Debbie R's wedding. I received letters from Mike for a while.